Response to Kris' Blog

Fellow blogger Kris made a post that well touched me and made cry and mourn my lost embryos: Life Begins When?

I see all of my embryos as my children. But not the same as the child that will come live in my home and call me mom. But nonetheless, those embryos were made out of the love, hope, and desire I share with my husband. They are so very special to me. They don't have to represent the same thing to other people and I don't try to judge people's choices. I just know that from my perspective, I've made life with my husband even if I never saw double lines, heard a heartbeat, felt a squirm, or kissed sweet toes.

The moments following an embryo transfer have been the most gorgeous of my life. Full of hope, I clutch my belly during the 2 week wait as if the act of doing so would coax an embryo to take notice and want to stay and thrive.

I might sound balanced often times in my posts but deep inside I am in pain, real pain. I feel longing, real longing. I still need to get up in the morning, put on my big girl pants, and go out into the world that refuses to stop and let me catch up.

Dang it... where are my kleenex? Thank goodness for office doors.